Gone.

(A poem I wrote many years back after my ‘fairytale break up’.)

For i can no longer take inside

the feelings I’ve gained without you at my side

my heart no longer beats

and my body no longer feels

my head keeps turning over and over

the events that led us to these ordeals.

loosing you has numbed me

for i no longer feel

what do you expect from me?

I never stopped wanting, nor stopped loving

but the pain left me running

in the direction that you weren’t coming.

I ran and ran until i turnt to find

you wern’t following

and realised you were gone,

sat there crying thinking what had i done

i ran in the hope you’d follow

not to be left alone in sorrow.

so i ran back the other way

in the hope to find and say

you’re my everything and I’m sorry

but when i got back

I’d been gone too long and you’d

already moved on.

so i was left with my mistake in my hand

tears falling, for this was not what I’d planned.

Touch.

I saw her today,

a face i hadn’t seen for a while,

she looked lost, full of confusion,

her beautiful eyes lacked their sparkle

and her face dressed in a smile

a lie even i could see

for through her eyes i saw her sadness

the shadow of loneliness lingered over.

Her mind wondering darkened allies.

For she was just a girl carrying a weight

a weight of pain of loves gone by.

A girl so misunderstood,

so mistakenly judged,

so unaware of her potential.

Such lonely eyes,

for all she wanted was to love.

I reached out my hand,

and in turn she reached out hers,

fingers touched, so cold,

my heart ached as i pulled back my hand in time with hers

as a tear fell from my eye in unison.

For it was just a reflection

created by the mirror that stood before me.

Untitled.

Our technology filled world is a cold place,
Hugs replaced with icons,
Kisses replaced with the letter ‘x’
Even physical contact has been replaced with facebook pokes.

‘i love you’ : the words seem stuck to the page, unmoving, distant and untouching.

‘I LOVE YOU’ you shout with th ecaps lock on, but still no feeling,
Just lines forming shapes known to us as words.

Feelings and emotions expressed by the pressing of buttons, the touching of keys, of individual letters strung together,
But each letter seems to hold no connection to its neighboring letters,
Stood next to one another in silence like soldiers waiting for battle,
Touching, but not feeling.

I miss you, the world before technology.
When words were beautifully joined to one another through the ink of a pen,
I miss when words had meaning, and didn’t lay flat on a page.
The sentiment of a thought out hand writen love letter,
An unexpected visit, encounter.

I love you words, spoken words with feeling.
The beauty of emotion in ones voice, in ones handwriting,
The beauty of seeing the words twist and curl from their lips into your ears.

You’re lost,
Body language so hard to read after technology has began to press and attempt to remould our minds,
A laugh replaced with an ‘LOL’
The beauty of a sigh blocked and surrounded by **
Leaving only our imagination to create the missing sound in our minds.

I love your voice, your body, your words,
Come back to me,

I miss you

*sigh* x